Sick, it's the New Coke

Yeah, I'm sick...so is *M*, so is baby *S* and for all I know so is our poor cat *N* except he's smart enough to steer clear of the plague-bringers and I've barely seen him in a week.

When you're contemplating what sweet release death could bring you from a virus that is kicking your collective asses around the block while laughing gleefully to itself, you realize that you can draw bizarre parallels to being ill and the ill-fated New Coke marketing campaign of the '80s.

Ok, so the fact that I actually remember the New Coke debacle dates me horribly...but bear with for a sec. We were all happy with regular "aka Original or Classic" Coke but didn't realize how OK we were with it until the horrible executives of Coca-Cola decided to take it away and replace it with NEW Coke which, like almost everything designed to be consumed or worn in the 80s, was awful. And then ohhhhhh how we missed Classic Coke....how we wished we could have just one more to remind us of the good old days before we got complacent about our soda (or Pop for you Yanks) drinking ways. Eventually, after we had suffered an appropriately long time, same evil executives decided to bring back our "Classic" Coke and even threw it a parade (of sorts) via a marketing blitz that would humble a politician on election day heralding its return to our store shelves. We all should have boycotted Coke - after all, there is something extremely insulting about being made to beg to convince a company to simply keep selling you the same item they had been selling for decades previously. Folly, or marketing genius - I'll leave you to decide.

Now if you replace Classic Coke with "my pre-existing wonderfully good health" and New Coke with "sorry you've got a VIRUS, no antibiotics for YOU Missy!" you're pretty much living my week. Longing for the great health I failed to appreciate until it was snatched from me...and now I wait, with ticker tape in hand, for the parade I plan to throw my immune system (previously quite unrecognized) just as soon as this virus heads the way of New Coke....